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Finding the best strap-on for you is like buying any sex toy : It depends a lot on your unique body and tastes. To help you decide which strap-on to take for a spin, we rounded up a mix of reviewer favorites and recommendations from sex educators and people who actually use them. On the other hand, choosing a harness and a dildo separately can mean matchmaking the best fit for your preferences, since there are several factors to consider for each.
For this article, we included both combo kits and individual harnesses.
According to Ashley Cobbfounder and host of Sex With Ashley and sex-toy reviewer, harnesses typically come in three main styles: jockstrap, thong, and underwear. Underwear looks like a pair of underwear or boxers. The style of harness typically informs the type of sizing available; jockstraps and thongs with adjustable straps usually come in one or two sizes and can fit a variety of bodies, whereas underwear harnesses are sized like similar articles of clothing. Adjustable harnesses might be a better choice if you plan on sharing your harness with a partner or want the option to adjust based on fluctuations in your body size.
Choosing a harness style is about how comfortable and stable it feels to wear and use, and these two factors can either go hand in hand or detract from each other, depending on the quality or type of your harness. Cobb says that the two-strap styles tend to have much better stability than the single-strap thong, which might make it easier for beginners to control. Comfort is a bit more personalized. For example, some people find strappy harnesses uncomfortable and prefer ones that feel more like underwearwhereas others find underwear style harnesses restrictive and difficult to use.
Certain styles might also lead to chafing, depending on the fit on your specific body. Cobb also recommends looking at how low the harness would sit on your body. Fabric or nylon harnesses are quite comfortable, washable, and can be used on multiple partners. And just like any underwear, some fabric is more breathable or better suited sex strap moisture than others. You want it to be the correct size for whatever size dildo you use with it, so check to make sure the diameters match up.
Some harnesses come with multiple O-rings of different sizes that you can swap in and out, while others have elastic O-rings that can stretch to accommodate a variety of dildos. Beyond that, there are a few more factors that might influence your sex strap as well such as how a strap-on looks when you wear it or how easy it is to put on or swap out different dildos for more varietybut the above are solid starting points. With all that in mind, here are some of the best strap-ons and harnesses to choose from.
All products featured on SELF are independently selected by our editors.
However, when you buy something through our retail links, we may earn an affiliate commission. This five-inch dildo is technically deed with pegging also known as anal penetration in mind, but Cobb recommends it for anyone who wants to start small, including for vaginal play. To say the Joque is beloved is kind of an understatement. When I first fell down the rabbit hole of searching for the right strap-on for me, review after review sang its praises for its comfort and usability. It really is that good. The padded straps are a nice comfy touch too.
Cobb recommends this as a starter kit for anyone who wants to start small but thinks they might size up in the near future, since it comes with two dildos. This kit also comes with a bullet vibratorwhich you can slip into a built-in pocket to add more sensation for both the giver and receiver. We use it a lot, and it still fits our needs: comfortable, sturdy, compatible with multiple dildos, and machine-washable. As a reminder, leather harnesses do require a bit more TLC than their fabric counterparts; you can hand wash it with soap and water, leather cleaner, or rubbing alcohol, and some people like using leather conditioner to keep it soft.
Compared to many sex strap harnesses on the market that only adjust up to 60 sex strap, this Curvy Collection strap-on harness extends up to 82 inches. Plus, the padded back support provides extra comfort and stability. RodeoH is perhaps the best known brand when it comes to underwear-style strap-on harnesses, boasting multiple styles to choose from, from lacy panties to retro boxers, as well as a large variety of colors. This set comes with a basic adjustable harness, but really, the vibrating dildo is the star of the show.
Bonus: It comes with a remote to control it more easily during strap-on play. These briefs get their stability from their tight-fitting and moisture-wicking fabric, meant to be comfortable enough for all-day wear under your clothes. You know, just in case you want to sex strap straight from work to play. They also have two vibrator rings above and below the O-ring, positioned to stimulate both partners. This unique strap-on is kind of a mix between an underwear strap-on and a jockstrap strap-on.
The silicone dildo itself is also hollow, making it a lightweight option. Strapless strap-ons can be a little intimidating. Meant to provide more sensation for both parties, strapless, dual-pleasure strap-ons are worn by inserting a bulb vaginally.
Up to you which way you go, but either way, the Fun Factory Share is popular for its firm-but-flexible silicone and heavy internal dildo. This harness comes with a special plug deed to fit with Doc Johnson Vac-U-Lock dildoswhich are deed for better control and stability. However, the plug is removable, and without it this padded harness is compatible with a variety of non—Doc Johnson dildos too. Reviewers shout out its comfort and sturdiness at a more affordable price.
Like the look of leather but not actually the leather part? Allow me to tempt you with this sexy lace-up harness made of vegan leather. With four adjustable straps, it fits hips that are up to 72 inches, which the manufacturer says is suitable for roughly sizes 12 to SELF does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
Any information published on this website or by this brand is not intended as a substitute for medical advice, and you should not take any action before consulting with a healthcare professional. Currently available in sizes XS to L. She's the author of the book The More or Less Definitive Guide to Self-Care and can be found writing around the internet about mental, emotional, and sexual health.
Most importantly, she's also a Virgo sun, Aquarius moon. Topics Shopping sex sex toys.Sex strap
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